It feels more than a little strange to me to be delving back into blogging in the midst of everything happening in our world right now. Putting words together has been a struggle in itself for me these past several weeks, but throwing them out into the universe in a time when we’re all constantly being drowned in words coming from every direction has seemed a bit asinine.
Jeremy has repeatedly had to remind me that sharing my voice on social platforms in this climate is not a selfish or a stupid thing, but a powerful and necessary one if it makes me feel more productive, light, and focused. And that occasionally sharing creative and cheerful thoughts and images alongside more serious and heavy ones may be delicate and difficult to balance, but necessary.
So, here I am, trying to toe the line and bring a bit more meaning into all that I decide to cast into the ether.
That being said, you likely clicked on this post to read about what our lives have been like lately. And I know that five, ten, and twenty years from now, I’ll likely appreciate having a look back at where my head was in the first half of 2020!
Here’s a high level overview:
We’re both working. A lot. Jeremy and I are incredibly thankful to be employed during this time, when so many others aren’t. We remind ourselves of this frequently, as we’re both putting in way more hours and effort than ever before, despite making a less money and often feeling like we’re chasing the non-existent light at the end of the tunnel. Both of our workplaces have been pulled in a hundred different directions due to COVID and other disruptors, both planned and unplanned, so tensions have been high and we’ve been moving at lightning speed since the middle of March. Just recently, we’ve both felt like we’ve been able to come up for a little air! With us both working opposite shifts, we rarely have a significant chunk of time together, but we’ve definitely learned how to appreciate and make the most of it when we do.
We’re investing our free time in movements that matter to us. We’ve both been spending a great deal of our free time not only educating ourselves and conversing about racial justice and equality, politics, and other current events, but taking the time to sign petitions, write and call representatives, donate, and overhaul how we shop to support businesses that are making a difference. I’m planning on putting together a post soon with some links to resources that I’ve found helpful in all of this!
We sometimes talk about our wedding. We’ve had a few friends and family ask us whether we plan to attempt getting married this year, since we rung in 2020 newly engaged. The answer is: absolutely not. Just days before Indiana went into quarantine, we booked our venue for October of 2021. At the time, we were a little bummed we couldn’t find a place to tie the knot later this year, and 2021 felt like ages away. Now, we’re so thankful we made that call and, though we haven’t been able to save and plan like we thought we would this year, still feel confident that we’ll be able to pull off an amazing celebration with our friends and family next autumn. That being said, we haven’t ruled out eloping as a Plan B if things don’t start looking up in regards to COVID. We’re hoping to really get into the planning process this summer. Stay tuned for more on that here!
We’re both battling extreme anxiety and bouts of depression. And we know we’re likely in good company with many of you reading this. Jeremy and I are both built in a way that allows panic and sadness to creep in even on the happiest, sunniest, most carefree of days—so the state of the world has brought that out in full force. And being highly sensitive people who tend to carry the emotional weight of others (and the world at large) before we’ll carry our own has caused us to feel downright exhausted even on our best days through this. We’ve both worked hard to tap into our healthiest coping mechanisms these past few months, and have been giving ourselves grace enough to accept that sometimes, if the act of simply getting out of bed, feeding ourselves, or uttering a word feel like too much, if the dishes sit a little too long or we didn’t cross a single thing off our to-do list, it’s okay. We hope that, if you can relate to this, you’ve found healthy ways to cope, too. ♥
We’ve recently committed ourselves to making time for the things that bring us joy. We both struggled a bit early on in quarantine, seeing so many people knocking out house projects left and right, losing weight like crazy, consuming more TV shows and movies than we could count, and feeding their creativity with newfound hobbies, feeling guilty for not keeping up. For all the reasons mentioned above, we simply didn’t have the time, funds, or energy to do any of it. Fortunately, with us finding our own groove and feeling slightly more optimistic, we’ve made a pact to start tapping into our creative sides and giving ourselves permission to step away from it all every now and then. I recently dusted off my camera for a photoshoot and my cupcake tins for a baking request for the first time in months. I’ve been tending to the garden, picking up books, and getting back into writing for fun. Jeremy is hoping to bring his guitars back to life soon and has started rattling off house projects he wants to take on for the remainder of the year (much to my delight)!
In short, we’ve been feeling pretty removed from others and ourselves these past few months, but are finally feeling more positive and confident in being able to look toward, and plan for, our future.
Much of this year so far has felt, for a lack of better words, hopeless. Yet, in each crazy, chaotic twist, there does lie a sprinkling of hope and opportunity. Right now, we’re focusing as much as we can on those silver linings and those partially opened doors, with every intent to bust them wide open and do our part in making ourselves and our wild, wild world even just the tiniest bit better.
How have you been feeling these few past months? Weeks? Today? What’s been getting you through? We’d love to hear how you’ve been pressing forward and staying hopeful!
xo, Aly