I’ve been putting this off for far too long now. It’s been well over two years ago that, in the midst of a breakdown over something so silly I can’t even recall what it was today, I first said to Jeremy, “I want to start my own blog. I need to do it. I’m going to do it” with the intention of diving in just days or weeks later.
I wish I could offer up an excuse better than, Life got in the way or I’ve just been so busy or The time was never quite right and feel better about procrastinating for as long as I have, but the truth of the matter is this: I got scared.
Every time I started to make some kind of forward momentum, those pesky, detrimental thoughts crept in. What if no one reads it? What if people get bored? What if I get bored? What if I can’t stick with it long enough or make it beautiful and meaningful enough and what happens if I fail?
Only just recently did I realize that it doesn’t matter. None of it. The whole point of saying, “I want to start my own blog. I need to do it. I’m going to do it,” those many, many moons ago – though I certainly didn’t realize it then – wasn’t first and foremost for everyone else. It was for me.
Life had begun rushing by so quickly after college, and had become so routine, that I was missing out on – or forgetting – the little (and even sometimes even very big) moments that make it so worth living. I was caught up in the stresses and monotony that often come with being an adult. I wanted to document those events and those days and those weeks – good and bad – so that I could reflect back and relish in the bits that mattered whenever I felt the need, and laugh at the ridiculousness of getting so frazzled and jaded by the dumb stuff.
And now, here it is. The start of something I’ve desperately needed to do. I’m feeling awfully good about it. So, hello. Welcome. Join along if you’d like, and if you not, that’s okay, too. I’ll just keep on keepin’ on the best that I can.