Hey, friends! It’s been quite the minute since I’ve checked in here. Though I’ve thought time and again about writing something out over the past several weeks, I’ve only just now felt like I’ve got my head on straight enough to do so without sounding like a rambling mess—but no promises that it won’t end up reading that way once I get going!

It’s no secret that we’re living in an utterly surreal time at the moment. With each new day comes updated headlines and statistics that are increasingly more difficult to fathom. I’m sure that, like me, you’ve felt as if you’re riding a roller-coaster of emotional highs and lows and in-betweens from one minute to the next. Personally, for the first month of this, I was so invested in my work—clocking in more hours and effort than ever before—that I was spending the majority of my time looking at things through a highly analytical and objective lens rather than an emotional and human one. Working in the banking industry as a communications professional, I was dedicating 70-80 hours of my weeks researching, writing, and communicating all things COVID-19 and finance-related, and staying updated on the ever-changing policies and procedures that were resulting in our workplace from our nation’s response to the pandemic. I was in the zone… and more than content with staying there.

But as the world has begun to adjust to this “new normal,” the pace at which we’ve constantly had to evolve at work has slowed, and I’m starting to pick back up on more familiar tasks and hours, which leaves me with far more time to think and feel all of this. And let me tell you, the first few days I had to let it all sink in and process it without being distracted by my work was a doozy. Yet, I know it’s an incredibly important and healthy part of staying strong and well through all of this—and that I should have allowed myself to do so much more early on.

The week leading up to the government shutdowns was not the kindest to us, and I was already feeling quite weighed down emotionally. I was struggling with a great deal of stress at work—the kind that had me feeling exhausted before I even walked into the office in the mornings. A few relationships in my life were beginning to feel terribly strained. My car unexpectedly, full-on broke down while driving the interstate nearly two hours from home and I had to quickly buy a new one—just one day after Jeremy and I had a tough and serious conversation about our finances and cutting our spending down drastically, in order to afford our upcoming wedding. And oh yeah, wedding planning! And right on the tail of these stressors, the first announcement (of what would be many) came that bars and restaurants would shut down—which left us thinking Jeremy (who makes his living bartending) would be completely out of work (fortunately, for now, he’s not).

Now, all of that feels like a lifetime ago and the anxieties I had about all of it seem to have dissolved and been replaced with newer, heavier ones that I share with the rest of the world. Death counts and the number of infected people increasing by the hour. The fear of being responsible for getting a loved one—or even a stranger—sick, as a result of simply running out for groceries. Financial struggles. Small businesses at risk of closing their doors permanently. The pointing of fingers and seeing people’s true colors. Wondering when we’ll get to hug our friends and family, travel, and attend large gatherings again. Trying to help children understand why they can’t go to school, see their friends, play at the park. Knowing that domestic violence and animal abuse are likely on the rise. Considering what our world will look like when it “opens back up,” knowing it will never be quite the same.

All of this is important to think about, discuss, feel, and act on, but it’s just as important to give ourselves a damn break.

21 WAYS TO STAY POSITIVE
WHEN THE WORLD FEELS HEAVY

Here are a few ways I’m able to level myself out when the world gets heavy—little tactics that bring me hope and calmness—and remind me that there is always, always, always a light at the end of the tunnel.

Establish Routines

Whether it’s a global pandemic that has forced you to shake-up your daily schedule or another major life event has you feeling stressed and anxious, developing and sticking to routines can help create order and calm in the chaos. While the state of the world may feel uncertain, you can take comfort in knowing that your routines are consistent. Try waking up, eating, logging-in, logging-off, exercising, winding down, and going to sleep at the same time each day.

Practice Mindfulness

Try meditating, deep breathing, or repeating a calming phrase to yourself throughout the day, especially when stress is running high. I often repeat the phrase, “this is not an emergency” to myself when I’m feeling like everything is on fire, and it does wonders for bringing be back down.

Create a Calming Space

Create a space that’s dedicated to helping you chill out. Keep it clean and clutter-free, except for a few indulgences—a candle, a favorite book, a cozy blanket, headphones, your secret stash of chocolate—and retreat to it when you need to take five minutes just for you.

On a larger scale, try keeping your entire living space tidy and comforting. Take just ten or twenty minutes to start or end your day to pick up clutter, wipe down surfaces, and get things in order to help you feel more calm and collected in your home.

Stop Scrolling & Disconnect

For at least an hour or two a day, don’t log-in to social media or go seeking out the latest headlines. While there’s plenty of good being shared, it’s all too easy to fall down a rabbit hole of negativity and come out feeling worse for it. This can be especially beneficial in the hours before bed, to avoid staying up way later than you planned, incessantly scrolling and getting anxious before falling asleep (and having nightmares as a result)!

Move & Stretch

Feeling emotionally spent (or being on lockdown) can make it really difficult to want to get up and move. But even small spurts of movement can help to release mood-boosting endorphins! Step away from your desk or couch every 20-30 minutes to stretch, get a glass of water, or take a quick walk. Play fetch with your dog, play tag with your kids, dance around the kitchen while making dinner.

Soak Up the Sun

If the sun’s out, don’t ignore it! If you’re able to step outside and soak it in for a few minutes here and there, you’ll instantly feel lighter. If you’re stuck inside, parking it in front of a window and letting the rays warm your skin is still enough to brighten your mood.

Get Outside

Even if it’s not sunny, the fresh air will do you good. Go for a walk around the block, sit on your porch, kick off your shoes and practice grounding in the grass, or go all out and tend to your yard or garden. Connecting with the earth and reminding yourself that there’s still so much life and beauty continuing to grow, despite how down or disconnected you may be feeling, is so important!

Find Comfort in the Familiar

Revisit an old favorite book, movie, TV show, or album. Reconnecting with familiar characters, storylines, and sounds is exceptionally comforting—knowing what to expect and what emotions you’ll feel from entertainment you’ve already consumed can bring peace of mind when you may not know what to make of the uncertainty that you’re dealing with in real life.

Get Nostalgic

While it’s important not to romanticize the past and pine for it, looking back on fond memories can bring joy. Flip through old photo albums, read old letters from friends, scroll through your phone’s photo album to revisit concert clips, birthday celebrations, and cute photos of your kids and pets. Be thankful for these special moments!

Give What You Can

No matter your emotional state, giving to others always feels good. Especially if they’re in need! Put together an unexpected care package for a loved one, donate to a charitable organization you believe in, support a local business (or its employees) that you frequent. Giving doesn’t have to come in the form of a gift or a monetary donation if you don’t have the funds for it; consider volunteering your time or talents, or simply helping to bring awareness by engaging with social media posts or sharing by word of mouth.

Reach Out

While it may feel easier to keep to yourself when you’re feeling down and out, human connection is always crucial. If picking up the phone and calling someone isn’t for you, that’s okay! Send a text or an email, write a letter, or send a message via social media. Try to reach out to even one person a day, even if it’s just to say hi. You never know how much they might be in need of a check-in, too!

Eat Well

For most of us, highly stressful or dark times may result in overeating, under-eating, or indulging in food that doesn’t do a whole lot to help our mental state (read: highly processed and sugar-filled options). While I’m a strong believer in that there are no “bad foods,” I do believe in the benefits of eating a balanced diet with plenty of fresh produce and nutrient-rich meals and snacks. Savor the flavors that nature has to offer and indulge other treats in moderation and you’ll notice a major shift in your energy and focus!

Get Creative in the Kitchen

On the topic of food, try spending a little more time creating from-scratch recipes. Baking and cooking can be really therapeutic! Dig up your family’s favorite from-scratch cookie recipe, knead away some of your stress baking bread, or get the whole family involved in creating a fancy five-course meal to enjoy together!

Grow Something

There’s nothing quite like seeing a bouquet of flowers on the table or a plate full of veggies for dinner and being able to say, “I grew that!” Watching life sprout from soil and grow bigger and stronger by the day as a result of your care is a really magical experience. You don’t have to go all-out and have an acre’s-worth of of crops—a small container garden or even a couple of houseplants are enough to make you feel good!

Create a Gratitude List

Take a few minutes each day to list out the things, people, places, and experiences you’re thankful for. It seems to come naturally to us to mentally list out the things we’re upset about or wish we could change, but it’s far more beneficial to take stock of what we’re grateful for.

In addition, I’ve seen a lot of people during lockdown making “what I take for granted” lists—jotting down things that we’ve come to realize we take for granted (dinner with friends, baseball games, live concerts, and so on). Doing this will, hopefully, allow us to practice more gratitude for even the “little things” going forward.

Learn Something New

If you’ve long wanted to learn how to sew, play an instrument, speak another language, practice yoga, or anything else, tuning into and exercising a new part of your brain is a great and productive way to busy yourself, lift your spirits, and grow!

Get Enough Sleep

A worried and stressed mind and body will only be made worse without adequate sleep. Though, it may be tricky to get a solid 6-9 hours if you’re the kind of person who suffers from anxiety-induced insomnia. Try creating a nightly routine that helps you wind down (no screen time an hour before bed, tea, a hot bath, melatonin, meditation) and encourages your mind to calm down enough to get a good night’s rest.

Treat Yourself

Don’t feel guilty for treating yourself to a mid-day nap, a glass of wine, a night of TV, or whatever else brings you some comfort now and then! It can be especially helpful to give yourself one small thing to look forward to around the same time each day to encourage you to stay focused and motivated.

Write Out Your Thoughts

Whether in the form of journaling, poetry, music, or a letter to a friend, getting your thoughts out in writing (or another creative form) is a healthy way to release and lift some of your emotional weight.

I was encouraged in college to list out my frustrations and negative thoughts on paper when I was feeling especially down and then destroy them—by tearing them apart or lighting them on fire—and found such great relief in doing so that I still put this into practice today.

Make Peace with Simply Being

If you’re feeling sad, anxious, worried, depressed, or hopeless, the last thing you need is to put pressure on yourself to feel differently or be more productive! Above all else, give yourself grace. Be okay with not doing a single thing except for being right where you are, in the state that you’re in. Let yourself feel whatever you need to and know that you will feel like yourself again in time.

Plan for the Future

It may seem senseless to make future plans when you’re struggling to see past today. But it’s so very important that we remember that there is a future for us—after lockdowns, after periods of deep depression or anxiety, after breakups, job loss, and the loss of loved ones—and that it’s not selfish nor futile to plan for better days. Make a bucket list, plan a dream vacation, continue planning for your wedding, your new home, or even a simple family gathering. There’s no better way to give yourself hope than by continuing to believe in a better future.

If you’re struggling with the weight of the world—or your own mental well-being—on a level that goes beyond occasional sadness and anxiety that just won’t go away, please don’t hesitate to seek professional help. There are plenty of options out there to consider. Many workplaces offer the benefit of free counseling options, there are several online/mobile therapy apps, and hotlines to call if you’re feeling depressed or suicidal. There is absolutely no shame in asking for help.

And if you just need someone to vent to, to release the pressure now and then, I’d be more than happy to chat!

I hope that you’ve been holding up and staying healthy, friends. I’d love to hear how you’ve been staying positive, caring for yourself, and spending your time over the past few weeks. Feel free to share your inspiration with other readers in the comments! ❤

xo, Aly